is my story good so far which readers will like?

Question

hi i m 14 i am writting a short horror novella not a big horror and not a small horror also it can be read by every age

Well I am Cindy a ghost hunter some of you might not believe in ghost and some of you might. Some of you might have purchased this book for entertainment but this book is more than any entertainment book because this tell my story how ghost became a part of my life . Like when you hear someone’s name the first thing that strikes your mind might be about his appearance, his attitude or any other thing. So today I will how tell what is the thing which strikes people when they hear my name. “Ghost one girl?” this is the word by people when they hear my name so today I will how I got this name through my stories. MY dear readers today I am going to tell you some of my haunted experiences I ever had in my life today I will tell you my soul less ghost story so back when I was a kid…

plez coment

Answer 1

Okay, couldn't get past the first four words. Cliched, bad grammar, and just bad. Awkward. Needs a lot of work. And please don't say your age. I don't care how old you are. When you say you are a 14 year old writer, it's like already putting you down. Like, you aren't a writer. You're just someone who wants to write that's young so people will take pity on you. Not to mention, you spelt words wrong just in that first sentence saying you are writing a story. No, it can't be read by every age because most people can't get past the first few words.

Answer 2

Uhh.. Sorry to break it to you, but this is pretty bad D:

You have a lot of grammar/punctuation, etc...Problems, and DO NOT start a story with her name, it's over clichéd and I wouldn't even look at the first 4 words without putting it straight down.

But if you want to keep it, it's up to you. I'll just correct it for you, if you want;



Well, I am Cindy. I'm a Ghost Hunter, some of you might not believe in them, yet some of you might. Some of you might have purchased this book for entertainment but this book is more than that, because this tells you how Ghost's became a part of my life. Like when you hear someone's name, the first thing that strikes your mind might be about his appearance, his attitude, or any other thing. So today, I will tell you what strikes people when they hear my name. "Ghost one Girl? (That doesn't make ANY sense)" This is the word by people when they hear my name. So today I will tell you how I got this name through my stories. My dear readers, today, I am going to tell you some of my experiences I have had in my life. And today, I will tell you my soul-less ghost story. So back when I was a kid.





To be honest, this is really terrible. Your sentences make no sense.



=/



Good luck though, and keep at it!

Answer 3

I really don't want to be mean here but this passage really makes me wonder if you've ever studied English in primary school. There are countless grammar mistakes, punctuation mistakes, spelling mistakes. In addition, the whole passage is highly reminiscent of chat-speak or something close to it.



I actually read the first sentence, did a double take and ran off to check on some other tab in my internet browser. Please don't forget that the first sentence of anything, be it a short story or a novel, is the one that is supposed to draw the reader in, not have them avoid reading the book altogether.



Sorry if this might seem a bit harsh but I'm guessing that since you posted it up here, you wanted some honest criticism.

The first step here is to go and polish up on your grammar and learn the basics of how to structure a sentence.

No matter how imaginative you are, a marginal command over the very basics of the English language and grammar will get you nowhere as a writer.

Answer 4

No readers will like this if I have to be real honest. There is one load of grammar mistakes, and half of it doesn't even make sense. If this is the opening of your story, I suggest you need to take on some help. You're plot should never be in the story. Only one age group would read this. Children. This wouldn't even get published to be a children's novel though. I suggest looking up some help.

Answer 5

i in my view do no longer think of being unique is particularly significant. the only way i attempt to be unique is by using taking an previous plot, then maneuvering it around so as that it would not shop on with cliches of that form. that's complicated, thinking lots of my thoughts incorporate vampires. frequently when I write, I purely write some thing i desire to study. There are not too many books approximately Grim Reapers available, and fairly no longer ones touching directly to the son of dying. So i'm writing it. i'm hoping that Reapers stands out as the subsequent massive element after mine is revealed :P As for examining a different tale over a time-honored one? i want a intense-high quality mixture. case in point: i admire city delusion, yet at present each and every UF is a replica of the different. they are all precisely alike. Now i admire particular factors of it. Kicka-s-s women, vampires, a clean international with a supernatural twist...yet i want some thing that could stand out whilst additionally following the comparable worry-loose formula. finally i desire to write down the e book that sticks out....when I be certain how. BQ: i've got began countless. A pastime of Thrones, The Thief, A Crack interior the Sky, and ineffective Witch jogging....they are all no longer the suitable i've got ever study. in spite of the fact that The Thief's ending became into exceedingly rattling good, yet i won't be able to advise it because of the fact something of the e book became into very uninteresting to me. i'm nonetheless going to assert the Seven nation-states sequence, even in spite of the undeniable fact that i finished it someplace around November. That sequence purely haunts me. the 1st e book is The Demon King, and the 2d is The Exiled Queen. i in my view love those books lots i could fee them up there with Harry Potter.

Answer 6

I actually have to say the same thing as It'snot Important, because your first sentence is ONCE AGAIN grammatically incorrect and the plot is cliched.

Answer 7

I personally dont like it. the town shoul be less upbeat.

Answer 8

*The Same as my other Answer*