Will you compare these two descriptive paragraphs? Which one sounds better?

Question

Two friends and I are having a contest. Whose paragraph sounds better? All three paragraph are the first introductions to a character. Our stories and writing styles are very different. Paragraph 1 is from a fantasy story that takes place on earth roughly 400 million years in the future. Paragraph 2 is taken from an action/romance about the mafia, government corruptness, and an assassin. Paragraph 3 is from a science fiction story that involves genetic crossing between humans and other species as a plot point. Give a 1-10 rating for paragraph one which follows:

Picture a young man, his dark leathery wings the same colour as his oily black hair; his eyes the colour and opalescence of grey moonstone. Akin to the typical citizen of Moonlight, his fingers are clawed as a cat’s and his pale skin appears to hold a certain flaky fluorescence. On his chin are the scant, barely visible beginnings of a beard. Loved by none, lover of no one, Shaft of Moonlight is a Wanderer. The Wanderers are generally treated with the same hospitality as lawyers or taxmen, as you surely know.
Picture the ever-present-over-water smog, being penetrated by a sudden ray of blinding rose light, and the brimstone brine that blanketed the brackish floor of the lake being dissolved by this light.

Now a 1-10 rating for paragraph two:

As the sun quietly set on the horizon, Nathaniel found it ever more difficult to concentrate. There were so many things that could go wrong at any moment; in fact, it was a miracle that they had lasted this long without being taken out. He admired his father for keeping the mob so well organized, however, he knew that he could not possibly do so well himself. Not only that, but people were determined he never get a chance to lead. With twelve known attempts on his life, and possibly more that never got off the ground, Nathaniel Skye is one of the few teenagers ever to face the perils of death by assassination.
Because of this, and much more, he is currently writing a suicide note.

Paragraph three:

Leo jumped down from one of the rafters on the thirty-foot-tall ceiling and landed nimbly on his toes in the middle of the crowd. There was silence. While Ylva’s voice wavered uncertainly when she talked, due to some odd gene that controls the great howls of wolves, Leo’s voice was a sort of crooning; he could have any person entirely mesmerized when he talked. This has always seemed odd to me; cats are more knows for their silence than they are for their vocal abilities, but sometimes you never know.
“It doesn’t seem unethical to me, and doesn’t my opinion matter the most? Besides, if these good scientists didn’t behave incredibly ‘unethically’ I currently wouldn’t exist. And I will say I’m rather happy to be alive,” he continued.

Which paragraph is the best?

Answer 1

Paragraph 1 - 6/10 - It's alright, but a bit too descriptive for me, a beginning has to hook you.



Paragraph 2 - 8/10 - The first bit is quite good, but I like the last two lines, they hook your attention.



Paragraph 3 - 9/10 - I preferred this one to the other two, even though this kind of book wouldn't normally be my kind of thing. It is more interesting and gets your attention.

Answer 2

Hey! I copied your paragraphs right into a phrase report and did a littel spell checker and constant a few matters up. I wish I helped however I do not feel I did very a lot Life can also be tremendously bland and dull every now and then with out a pleasure to liven matters up. However, if you happen to ever step foot into Bridgeport, Connecticut assume overdue nights with pictures so fascinating that it catches the eyes of gods, song so loud and memorizing it pumps existence into each ear it reaches. Bridgeport my residence clear of residence not anything can examine to the nights I spent dwelling existence to the fullest in my possess place of origin. There are many folks who could disagree and retort that the scent of burning rubbish combined with the sight of damaged down residences, drug purchasers, and homeless folks who fill the streets like ants on rotten meals is ample to preserve you from coming close this town however I disagree. Although this town has its unhealthy features I suppose that its negatives are glorified and its positives are left ignored. Aside from, the negativity this town draws there’s additionally a paradise facet if you already know in which to move. I used to be born there so suppose me while I say the odor of vegetation, oranges, strawberry or even material softener can’t examine to the scent of a stunning feminine within the town of Hartford getting ready to move out on a Friday night time. The sound of laughter fills the air as the youngsters roll round and play at the gentle soft grass that fills each nook of this awesome town. And while the kids get worn out and exhausted from gambling meals compatible for a king is ready to fill there nourishment. The meals in Bridgeport, Connecticut is so scrumptious it may well placed any 5 big name eating place to disgrace. The items and the bads of Bridgeport is what isolate’s it from some other town and I want it under no circumstances alterations. That's the outcome after I placed right into a Word Document and constant it up. Please investigate it once more! I had been identified to make spelling mistakes and such... Good success!!!

Answer 3

P1- 8.5

P2- 5

P3- 5.5



Villans: paragraphs 1+3?

Answer 4

Okay,



P1=9

P2=7.8

93=7



I really liked No. 1, i could totally see where he was going.



And I have no clue about the villain thing.