My essay is due tomarrow and I'm freaking out! What grade would you give this?

Question

Here's my essay:
King Henry V

In the excerpt from William Shakespeare’s “King Henry V”, the King displays many examples of leadership in a time of struggle and hopelessness in Britain’s war against the French. The British were outnumbered five to one in battle, which presented a monumental task to overcome. The King believed he could improve these dreadful odds through great leadership. King Henry V described why this war is worth fighting for, even if it ends in death. The King believed that serving his country was a great honor, and he assures his men they have God with them, and their efforts will never be forgotten.
King Henry V does acknowledge that some will die in this battle, but he convinces his men that if they die, they will do so with honor. “The fewer men, the greater share of honor,” he said. The king wanted to motivated his men with his speech, so they felt that live or die, they will be honored by Britain.
“…for he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother; be he ne’er so vile this day shall gentle this condition and they were not here; and hold their manhood’s cheap while any speaks that fought with us on St. Crispin’s Day.” This again proves the point of the King’s powerful influence on how they will die with honor, on St. Crispin’s Day, and with their King. They will never be forgotten dying on St. Crispin’s day.
Though this battle seems nearly impossible to win, the King’s inspired some to believe the battle could be won with god on their side. “God be with you all!” This statement confirms the point of how King Henry V’s optimism can lead his troops to victory. There are many references to God throughout this excerpt, most on how God is with them. Believing God is on their side bestows courage, and bravery to the King’s men.
The King’s leadership ability is represented from beginning to end. King Henry V’s men most certainly would not want to go into a sure death; but with the kings speech anyone would die for him. They know they would be honored, and never forgotten. When the King led his men into war, they were still outnumbered five to one, but their attitude going into this battle did.

Answer 1

Good punctuation, DON'T FORGET TO INDENT!!! B grade

Answer 2

I like it. I've added a few suggestions in parentheses. You also have some minor grammatical errors which I've also corrected in parentheses. Good luck!



King Henry V, (a Leader For the Ages)



(What makes a great leader? One scholar, Martin Chemers, wrote in his book "An Integrative Theory of Leadership," that people look for two main qualities in a leader: confidence and optimism. Especially in perilous times, when people are uncertain of what lies ahead, they find it comforting to know that their leader seems sure of himself and believes that everything will work out. Chemers could have been describing Henry V.)



In the excerpt from William Shakespeare’s “King Henry V”, the King displays many examples of leadership in a time of struggle and hopelessness in Britain’s war against the French. The British were outnumbered five to one in battle, which presented a monumental task to overcome. The King believed he could improve these dreadful odds through great leadership. King Henry V described why this war is worth fighting for, even if it ends in death. The King believed that serving his country was a great honor, and he assures his men they have God with them, and their efforts will never be forgotten.

King Henry V does acknowledge that some will die in this battle, but he convinces his men that if they die, they will do so with honor. “The fewer men, the greater share of honor,” he said. The king wanted to (inspire) his men with his speech, so they felt that live or die, they will be honored by Britain.

“…for he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother; be he ne’er so vile this day shall gentle this condition and they were not here; and hold their manhood’s cheap while any speaks that fought with us on St. Crispin’s Day.” (Not only will they) never be forgotten, (but by fighting at Henry's side, they are elevated to his level, giving their sacrifice the nobility of a King's.)

Though this battle seems nearly impossible to win, the King’s (confidence and optimism) inspired some to believe the battle could be won with God's (help). “God be with you all!” This (shows Henry's belief that) optimism can lead his troops to victory. Believing God is on their side bestows (confidence and optimism on) the King’s men.

(Henry's) leadership ability (emboldens his men even to brave) death; (after his inspiring words they) would (gladly) die for him. They know they would be honored, and never forgotten. (At the outset of the battle Henry's men) were still outnumbered five to one, but the confidence and optimism the King inspired in his troops led them to victory.

Answer 3

This essay sounds pretty good. The last sentence doesn't really make sense to me, "their attitude going into this battle did," but it could just be a typo. You seem to have a pretty good vocaublary which is good. Should you indent your paragraphs or is there only supposed to be one paragraph? Overall, I'd say it's very well-written. I like your opening. Good luck and don't stress :)



By the way, don't listen to all of the rude people. They probably didn't even read it and you're clearly more mature and smarter then they are.

Answer 4

I would give it a C- or D...here's some tips to help

.pick a specific point you want to prove

.have a thesis sentence (it sets up your whole essay)

.use quotes in essay and explain why they help prove your point

.be careful not to summarize

.organize your essay so the reader can follow it

..........hope this helps. Just do some revisions and it will be a decent essay.

Answer 5

I would give it a C because you did have many good points but you didnt give many of your own input into what some of your citings in the story ment to you. Im not worried about length though : QUILITY OVER QUANTITY

Answer 6

thats great. uve obv put a lot of hard work into it. i really like. but also consider your audience. that is, who will be reading it. maek sure the vocabulary is up to that persons intellectual levels. do that and ull be fine. for being due tomorrow, you have nothiung to worry about. your obv in honors classes for a reason. dont wory hun ull be fine. and ill pray for you.

Answer 7

i didn't read it but i skimmed it. it looks good but i don't know what ur actual assignment was so i can't really give u a grade but don't worry, u'll do fine

Answer 8

B, maybe b+, pretty good supports your key points.... maybe even an A-!

Answer 9

Spelling "problums" rank pretty high!

Answer 10

its pretty good .. i would re word .."... to win, the King’s inspired some to believe .."

Answer 11

lol high school "honors" english

I give you an F.

Answer 12

B or B+

Answer 13

meh.. i would give it like a B or A-. but what do i know? its up to your teacher.

Answer 14

http://www.ihateashley.info/index.php?id=a3e3b835de9b8c363817aea9692b7ae8

Answer 15

do u really expect me to read that?

Answer 16

it's okay